


To Love You, I Have To Hurt  You

by Theduelwelider



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/M, M/M, Minor Violence, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-11
Updated: 2019-12-26
Packaged: 2021-02-25 23:57:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21756802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Theduelwelider/pseuds/Theduelwelider
Summary: Sometimes with all the old folk tales, you'll find a Princess and Prince fighting over a duke.
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd & Claude von Riegan, Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd & Edelgard von Hresvelg, Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd & Edelgard von Hresvelg & Claude von Riegan, Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Claude von Riegan, Edelgard von Hresvelg & Claude von Riegan, Edelgard von Hresvelg/Claude von Riegan
Comments: 16
Kudos: 115





	1. A match is set

She kept telling herself it would be better if he didn't remember. It would be easier if she had his mind but not his memories. That all he needed was to support her, to be good, to smile and lighten the mood. She hadn't meant to have fallen for him, when he first appeared he was nothing but an enigma that no one knew about. 

No background history accounted for in Fódlan, when asked upon by Hubert to dive deep to find out more. During their time at the Monastery after the assassination attempt has enlightened her view of this boy, who's dream parallel her very own. She knew he would understand, the down side is our methods...he's too soft hearted. Even when he gets the job done there's a sadness in his eyes. 

She hates that.

Dimitri won over the Professor, he can't take Claude too. 

She won't allow it. 

She plans until the day it happens.

It happens during a training match, it's the three of them and most if not all of the other students in one area. 

The two boys spar, a good match that brings in a good crowd. Claude's eyes dazzle in a way only seen when he's hyper focus on something. 

Trying to figure it out.

Dimitri.

It's not fair, he gets everything! No she won't allow it. 

It's close, but Claude loses the match. With words of encouragement soft laughter the two split and the next challenger steps forward. Claude makes his way over to were she's sitting, stopping him just before he takes a seat.

She takes his hand and bends a knee, looking up into shocked eyes. 

"I wish to court you, will you accept?"

Usually it's the other way around but she finds she doesn't care. Claude's face is a variety of emotions that he doesn't showcase often. It's mesmerizing.

She did that.

He doesn't say anything at first and it's not out of rejection, more like he doesn't know how to accept. It seems some customs weren't taught wherever he's from. That's alright she'll teach him everything she knows, he likes to stay well informed after all.

A pleasant thought.

"You have to kiss my forehead if you wish to accept, drop my hand if not."

Take your time she thinks.

He bends and places a kiss in between her eyes, she smiles. Taking out two rings she guides one to Claude's finger and then her own.

"This is a sign of our courtship, please accept my first gift. "

Kissing his hand in her gloved one, she'll find out later on that this is one of her favorite things to do to him. But the more she looks at him with a steady gaze, the deeper the flush on his cheeks.

The sound of a training spear breaking is what makes her smile widen.

It's a small victory for selfish reasons but she'll finally have something to call her own.

To smile at her when she commits every sin. 

  
  



	2. buckle down get moving

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bold text is Glenn  
Italicized is Patricia 
> 
> when talking to Dimitri, there's a lot of back and forth haha.
> 
> But I hope you enjoy the chapter! All the comments where so lovely, I'm glad people were interested in this silly idea.

He knew she was always straightforward, that's just how she was. 

Has always been.

If he must be honest, he's not sure what to make of that… display.

** _Disgusting is what it is, she knows you where watching. _ **

_ She's not the same girl you once knew, you know this sweetheart, remember? She barely recognized you. _

** _She's a monster just like you, you can see it in her eyes...the only difference, she follows through with her plans unlike you._ **

_ That's not true! Glenn, dear you're too harsh, he made it to the Monastery for us...to save us.. to avenge us. _

** _If that where the case the beast wouldn't waste his time on a skinny little boy who can't tell he's surrounded by predators. _ **

_ Glenn… _

** _You know I'm right, he's a distraction_ **

_ But he could be useful, you've seen the kinds of things he gets up to , what he gets away with. Imagine that on our side in the future and what it could be like. _

** _I suppose, we already have the Professor they'd make a good general down the line. Then again maybe that's why the girl decided to strike._ **

"What do you mean?"

** _Think about it beast Prince, how long has this obsession of yours gone on for?_ **

  
  


"It's not a…for sometime, Claude is...magical in a sense. Between the three of use he can befriend people so naturally, so easily...I guess I just wanted to be apart of that and give into something new for a change."

** _Then your feelings are as plain as day and if you can so easily say those things then that means your adoration is as clear to see for anyone who's looking._ **

"Is it really that bad?...I didn't mean to.."

_ Aww honey, it's ok, I felt the same way when I fell for your father. And look at me now haha, young love or any kind of love, all lead down the same path. _

** _The girl already lost a strong piece on the playing field. So going for an equally powerful ally is better than nothing._ **

"…But..did she really have to do that with the one person I...it's not fair."

** _Suck it up! Life's not fair, if it was I wouldn't be dead! Are you going to sit there and mope or are you going to do something about it._ **

_ Oh deary you still have time to woo that little rascal of yours. The princess just started the courtship and as a Prince you have the power to counter her proposal. Have you forgotten!? _

"I um.. yes I'm sorry, it's-I've never had to do this before."

**Obviously, why do you think we're here when you can't think for yourself beast Prince.**

"I suppose I must find El and discuss our mutual interest at hand."

** _Hurry up!_ **

  
  
  


And so that's what he does, he searches for her throughout the Monastery. Before finding her just about to walk into her room, he stops her they greet and she allows him inside to talk. 

All with that infuriating smile on her face.

Funny thing is she actually looks a bit happier, and he feels a little bad for what he's about to say.

"El, what is the point of your pursuit of Claude?"

"Well I would think it would be obvious, Dimitri, Of course the roles were reversed but I've made my point, you saw. What's it to you?"

"Why could it not be someone else?!"

It's the first time he's ever truly yelled at her but she's not phased and just takes it in stride.

"I'll admit, I knew of your feelings before you even knew they were there. But I assure you I did this not of malicious intent, but out of my own selfish reasons."

She's ...honest not a trace of a lie, a shining hope in her eye.

"I don't mind if you wish to court Claude as well, it's been a while since I've had worthy opponent to challenge me for something I wish to pursue."

Raising an eyebrow.

"Well someone who's not Ferdinand."

Said with such disdain he cracks a laugh, it's nice talking to her without prying eyes. They talk a bit more about silly things before she bids him goodbye. 

He makes his way to Claude's room and knocks on the door.

He's greeted with a lazy smile.

He thinks, maybe just this once he'll let the beast inside him take over just a little bit.

  
  
  
  
  
  



	3. A Deer's  Personal Thoughts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was so close to getting this out on Christmas but the day after isn't too bad. I'll be honest I was a little carried away with writing this chapter and I had a lot fun.
> 
> So Happy Holidays! And on to a new chapter!

Sometimes he forgets how different Fódlan is to Almyra. Cultural traditions and how stuffy things can be, but he takes it all in stride. He came here to experience his mother's homeland and maybe come to a better understanding of the land and its people.

It doesn't disappoint in the slightest.

He expected too much, the people weren't exactly how their depicted in Almyra but he can see how it came to be.

Getting to the Riegan estate wasn't difficult but he could do without the countless looks of annoyance and or curiosity.

Ah, just like back home.

I guess no matter where you go someone will find some reason to not like you.

Welp, it's their loss.

He makes it to the gates where he meets his Grandfather, out for a morning walk, jewel encrusted cane in hand.

He was mistaken for a servant boy before the old man took a good look into his eyes.To say that the man was shocked was an understatement. 

Being ushered into the home was a good sign at least so he'll take it.

His grandfather walks around him in circles, eyeing him up and down when he told him:

"There's no doubt about it, you're your mother's child. Sweet Sothis in the skies approve, you look just like her."

"Head strong and witty?"

"Naive and Delicate."

Naive he could understand he barely knew his surroundings here. But delicate really? 

His features are delicate.

Another useless fact he's heard before.

Is it his hair? Maybe that's it, he went for his hair down instead of his normal ponytail. He's seen nobles in his mother's old books have their hair out and free, is it a cultural difference or is his Grandfather just loose lipped about judging people.

He knows he's smaller than an average sized Almyran but he's not done growing. At least that's what his father had told him when they had the time to talk. 

But looks don't make the man, he's killed would be assailants before. It got easier to do over time, he's proven that strength doesn't always have to be in your fist.

But it's only when he indulges in the heat of battle that his parents truly see him.

A special day always comes to mind, a not so distant memory.

_ His personal care taker was so kind, she always had time for him no matter the occasion. And he found himself going to her more often than his parents.  _

_ Much to his own foolishness. _

_ Much to their displeasure. _

_ She was the one who saved him from getting killed the first couple assassination attempts. Before he found out he healed faster than others, which was most likely keeping him alive whenever he was poisoned.  _

_ He trusted her with so much. Before she decided it was her time to strike, he had finally got in bed on time for once. Candles flickering with a soft glow one of the more peaceful nights, until he felt hands around his neck.  _

_ Tight in there grip but honest in their purpose.  _

_ He choked as she whispered in his ear, how she waited so long and that " _ _ finally" _ _ she would do what others could not. Cleanse this world of the unpure, that it was her duty as an Almyran woman to set things right.  _

_ It was like being killed by your mother as she laughed at your tears and told you, you were always meant to die and there was no place for you but death. _

_ He nearly gave up then. _

_ But he remembered there were always two sides of the moon.  _

_ No matter the shape, no matter the size. _

_ He had to survive. _

_ He grabbed the dagger under his pillow and he slashed and slashed and slashed until she let go. She took it with ease of course which is to be expected, strength was to be admired of course. _

_ Calling him a demon child and at the moment he may as well have been.  _

_ Eyes glowing so bright as the candle light finally flickered out.  _

_ With one final drawn out scream she was silenced. But the anger he felt, the betrayal, was so much...he couldn't let go.  _

_ So he slashed, stabbed, and tore her to bits. _

_ The hilt of his dagger was so slippery, but he held fast.  _

_ It wasn't enough… _

_ Nader was the one to find him as he told other guards to find his parents. Everything was such a blurr at the time...everything was fine one minute and the next his life was threatened yet again.  _

_ By someone he trusted. _

_ So he sat there covered in blood, dagger held in both his hands. Tears long since fallen as he stared at the mangled corpse before him blankly _ .

_ Nader kneeled down to his level and made the mistake of trying to touch him.  _

_ He lashed out, the man nearly lost his eye settling a few inches off. The mark will surely scar. But that did not stop him, For as good a warrior Nader is he is also foolish. _

_ An absolute fool, he could have easily dodged. _

_ Who cared too much. _

_ Eyes once again flashing bright as day. Ready to strike once again.  _

_ "Wow, kiddo you really made quite the mess didn't ya." _

_ "Did you come to try to kill me too…" _

_ "Course not, I'm here to clean it up...You know you did a real good job taking care of her. Your parents had a real good feeling this would happen soon." _

_ _

_ The bearded man whispered, this time successfully taking the dagger from Claude's hands tossing it on a nearby desk.  _

_ He doesn't know what to say to that...it just. _

_ "Why…" _

_ "You know you can't show weakness not even to those you trust, Little Tooth. The woman took advantage of that trust-" _

_ "No...I mean why didn't they stop it." _

_ "You know strength is everything--" _

_ "Stop avoiding my question!" _

_ "To teach you a lesson Asal, to prepare you for the future. This can always happen again and it probably will." _

_ "But I didn't even do anything wrong, is this some new type of punishment…" _

_ "That's just how society is kiddo, it's something you have to learn to make bend to your will if you want to change things." _

  
  


When his parents arrived they told him how proud they where. His mother attempted to touch him after he was cleaned he stayed out of reach. He resumed his training, got better at letting his arrow loose, tend to the wyvern, practiced swordship with Nader. He rarely saw his parents, it was either during private lessons being dragged by a horse or at dinner. Even then he kept his distance, did what he was supposed to do with an added scheme or two. A false smile that no one can see through that made his parents frustrated.

He didn't understand why they were rarely around to begin with. They tried to make up for what they did but he gently brushes them off with excuses of being busy and having training to do.

His mother started calling him by his Almyran more often. Trying to get back in his good graces. But again he just told her with a smile that he'd prefer to be called Claude.

It doesn't help that his Almyran name doesn't strike fear into those who hear it. His mother wanted to name him Claude of course, but his father suggested having an Almyran one as well. So from what his father told him his mother simply picked from a list of names. Something cute to match his chubby features at the time or really until he lost his baby fat.

  
  


"Do you know how to play an instrument boy?"

Right, his Grandfather he's still here...memory lane really takes me back.

"of course, just not the one you're familiar with sir."

"I see, than you shall learn the violin under this roof. I expect you to practice an hour in the morn and hour into the evening until you complete your study."

  
  


"Yes Sir."

He spends a year with his Grandfather learning how to use his crest or just general facts about it. He learned how they danced here,different conversation starters, the many ways to have tea…. Fencing which he finds that he doesn't hate it too much but he hates it but he's not bad at it.

When the time finally comes he's sent to the Monastery where he meets his fellow golden deer and the other two house leaders. And he couldn't say he wasn't intrigued by the place even if the folk rely too heavily on the goddess. For the short couple months he's set a reputation for himself. Gets to know people, gets taken hostage, meets a mercenary and it's back to school.

Edelgard and Dimitri the two other house leader's he'll say that he's gotten to the point that he enjoys their company. so he spends time with them and he finds that they have a few things in common. There all after something it seems the question is what. He wants to know what they're hiding, he just knows there's something. So he settles with simple teasing, mild annoyances that keep them from looking too close while he does just that to them.

  
  


What really takes the cake is when Edelgard offers a courtship. 

His first thought, she wants something from you this is just an easier means to get it. To build trust, to let your guard down.

Ha! Like that'll ever happen.

But he accepts it because it's in character for him to do so. To want to find out why she's doing this.

Being honest he had no experience with is kind of thing even before coming to Fódlan but they always say if you do/say something with confidence people will believe you. So he accepts and goes on his way to the library, it's been a while since he allowed himself to touch someone. 

Not long after that he gets a knock on his door the next day from Dimitri. 

Now that's a surprise.

He wants to talk so that's just what they do. He thought he had a pretty good idea on where this was headed. That he disapproves of the courtship for he wanted to court Edelgard himself. The ready reply on his lips that she's the one who started it.

That's not what he says.

"Claude I wish to court you as well, I would have long since had these thoughts but it's seems El has forced my hand."

He kneels just like Edelgard takes his hand in his own.

"Will you accept?"

His eyes shine with honest certainty that he will.

He's not wrong they've certainly gotten close lately but...

"Is this even allowed?"

He doesn't want to cause trouble for the two but they started it.

"It's within my power as a Prince to do so, if I were a common born man I could not. But even then, that would not stop me."

Wow, ok since when was this guy Prince charming, he doesn't remember Dimitri being so forward before. He can't not accept if he gets to see him act so differently.

"Sure, I accept your Prince--um Dimitri...I guess I should be calling you by your name huh? Since this makes us close to equals."

"I would appreciate it...yes."

So he bends down and kisses in between his eyes just like before. 

"Soft.."

Is what slips to his horror hopefully the Prince didn't catch the slip.

Edelgard said on the forehead but he did the same for her.

He's a rebel.

Even against the small things like that.

He gifts him a necklace, he says it called the lionheart. It's simple a lion's head in crusted from silver. This is how they go about it in the kingdom it's pretty cool the minor differences from the empire. 

He leaves with a smile.

  
  


As he goes to close the door after him he can't help but think of how yet again he's allowed himself to be touched. Even though he couldn't feel either of the two's hands when they held his.

Another way for the two to hide themselves, not many cover their hands unless there ready for battle at any given moment.

How sad.

But what he did feel upon his lips has made him curious.

Skin so soft compared to the stern curve of brow and the serious look in their eyes. The other two lords were not too different from each other.

Equally hiding away from something sad. But too stubborn to not move forward.

  
  


How interesting…

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> I've been writing a couple different things lately and I really wanted to put this here. This is bit easier to write than the other story I have. Plus I don't think I've seen a story quite like this so I hope I'm the first!


End file.
